Why I Sometimes Choose Ignorance

We've all heard the saying "ignorance is bliss." I'm just beginning to understand what that means. It seems like the more I watch the news, check my Facebook newsfeed, and listen to the radio, the more evil and sadness in the world becomes apparent to me.

I'm watching the news and I hear a story of a woman who has murdered 7 babies inside of her own home. Then I hear stories of a family who lost their father due to an affair or cancer or drugs. Then of a grieving family who lost their sweet and precious little one to pneumonia. Then of hundreds of girls being kidnapped by terrorist groups in war-torn countries. 

Becoming a mother has certainly made me more sensitive and emotional. When the twins were just a few days old, I was up feeding them in the middle of the night and reading a story of a girl I knew in high school. I didn't know her very well, but her story left me sobbing for hours. Her baby was born quite prematurely and was in the NICU. About the same time as my sweet little infants were placed in my arms, her precious little one passed beyond the veil to the other side. It still brings me to tears, thinking of losing a child. I can't imagine the pain and sorrow that accompanies such a horrific loss. And then I'm left to wonder why I am so blessed that I still have my two little miracles. Why me, and not her? I know everyone experiences different challenges in this life. And that our Father in Heaven would never ask us to endure anything that we were not capable of. And of course there is life after death. What a blessing to know that families can be together forever, even when they are only together for a short time here on this earth. 

Sometimes when I see a headline of a sad story, I turn off the television. Or I don't follow the online link to read the story at all. Because I feel like my heart can't handle it. Most of the time I feel like I would honestly rather not know what is going on. And then I struggle with myself because I know it's not good to be ignorant.

Last year when I was working at the high school, a group of college students came and put on an assembly on ignorance. They spoke about how when we hear about something sad we say, "Oh, that is so sad." And maybe shed a tear of two. And then go on with our life like nothing ever really happened. 

I know that's exactly what I do. It's so much easier to pretend like the evil and sorrowful things aren't really there. And more than that, even if I fully face it and acknowledge all these bad things that happen, what am I to do about it? Hold my family a little closer. Hug my kids a bit tighter. Be grateful for what I have every single day because there are those who go without. Live every day to it's fullest.

In truth I'm completely conflicted between turning a blind eye and pretending the bad doesn't exist, and becoming totally overwhelmed by it all and not knowing what I can actually do about it. I'm not at all comfortable with choosing ignorance, but nor am I comfortable with facing reality. I'm hoping to find a better way to cope, and am wide open to suggestions.