Only for a Season

You know before you have kids when you look at other people with their children and think "I'll never do that" or "I can't believe they do it THAT way"? Yeah me too. I plead guilty on many, many accounts. In my pre-child mind, having kids wouldn't change the way that I lived my life. I would still like the same things, go on the same types of trips, hang out with all the same friends, still go on weekly date nights... you know. And even when I found out I was having twins I still thought it would be possible. "It's a choice" I thought. Which it is. I just failed to realize that my priorities might change. And that sometimes a baby getting in a good nap is more important than making it to a lunch date with a friend. Not always, but sometimes.

I love the thought of being outdoorsy and adventurous. I've done a lot of camping, boating, snowmobilling, and hiking (confession: according to my sister, I've done SOME hiking.. not a lot). The point is, I love doing all of that stuff and I thought I would make the choice to keep doing those things. And I still want to. But in the last ten months I've learned that some things aren't worth doing anymore. Someday they will be, but not right now.

My family is all about adventure too. In March they planned a trip to hike Havasupai. It's a trip I've heard rave reviews about, and I wanted to go SO bad. I tried just about every way to make it work, but when it came right down to it, I was nursing, Forrest was busy at work, and asking someone to take care of my twins for a week was A LOT to ask of someone. So I stayed home, and tried to be positive about it. And today, more of my family went to hike King's Peak. I had planned to go, until last week when Forrest got a last minute out-of-town work assignment. Camping trips to Goblin Valley, entire days spent with friends and family, late evening dinners and activities.. I want to do it all. But I have to remember that my kids will only be little for so long. Months and years from now they will LOVE to camp and hike and run and play and spend all day out in the sun without taking a nap. But for now, they are happiest when they can nap on schedule, have an air-conditioned (or heated) building nearby, and get to bed on time. And happy babies = happy me. 

So for now, sacrifices will be made. Today will pass all too soon and in the blink of an eye my babies will be grown. It is only a season. After all, isn't parenting all about putting your childrens' needs in front of your own?